Creating Radical Resolutions

New Year’s Resolutions Pt. 1: Joy-filled and Shame-free!

The beginning of a new year is a fantastic time to look at the big picture of your life! You can reflect on the past, and dream about the future with (I hope) a rested body, a full-belly, and a possibility mindset!

But based on observations in myself,  in others, on social media, and in advertising, the catalyst for a lot of our desired change is a feeling of lack: the thing about us we’re embarrassed, or ashamed isn't ‘perfect’ about us yet. 

“I’m not smart enough, skinny enough, strong enough, talented enough, successful enough, outgoing enough” etc…usually based on a perceived societal standard. 

We all have things we want to improve about ourselves and our lives. My favorite people are those committed to constant growth. And seeing what isn’t happening yet is a good place to start.

But too often the changes we prioritize are motivated by our desire to change how we feel others see us. 

…In short, we cater to our shame rather than our joy.  

We think “If I can change _____ then people will like me more and/or  I’ll finally deserve to be happy.”

But we only have so much control over the way others see us. And chances are, even if we succeed in our goal, we still won’t feel satisfied or happy long, because “they’ll” find something else to change, and there’s a threat that “their” view of us will change again. 

Our resolutions should exist to improve our lives in a deep and meaningful way, and we can find ways to do so that don’t hinge on others’ perception of us.

So…

What if you focused your resolutions on adding joy, rather than reducing shame?

What if you used resolutions as an opportunity to practice your own core values? Rather than imposed values?

I’ll be giving you prompts and tips over the next few days that I hope will help you make value and joy-based New Year’s Resolutions! 

Stay tuned!