“No Goals Day”
Have you experienced “goals burnout?” When you’ve goal-ed so hard you can’t goal anymore? Me too…
I decided to experiment with a “no goals day” a while back, and I’ve since done a few more with lovely results so I thought I’d share the journey with you in case a “no goals day” is right for you!
What is a “No Goals day”?
It’s a day you don’t set any goals, to-do’s, or appointments.
A day you do what you feel like doing in the moment.
Gasp
How is it different from a day “off”?....Maybe for you, there’s no difference. It depends on how you spend your days off. For me, it just felt different. It was about adjusting my mindset around permission-to-not.
My rules for my “No Goals Day.”
1. Don’t make a to-do list.
2. Don’t gear yourself up to do anything. (Ex: “I said I was going to empty the sink so ughh, let’s go Beth…empty the sink!”)
3. Do only what you feel like doing in a given moment. Start when you want to start. Stop when you want to stop.
4. Do follow your whims.
If I felt like sitting there, I would. If I felt like cleaning the house, I would. If I felt like scrolling, I would. If I felt like singing, I would. If I felt like going on a walk, I would. Right then and there.
*(NOTE: If you’re already angrily saying, “Beth, this is impossible for me!” I’ve got a note for you at the end, don’t worry).
I had some fears…
I was afraid that I would give into “laziness,” accomplish “nothing,” and feel “behind.” I was afraid that my whims were deviant rascals not to be trusted. I was afraid if I left myself to my own devices for a day I would become a couch monster never to return to the real world…
What ended up happening was…
I had a great day. It felt like a healthy mix of refueling, refocusing, resting, progressing, and exploring. I followed my curiosities. I got to the park. I did a little housework and a little career work. I ended the day feeling satisfied, cared for, and surprised/pleased with what I did.
I learned more about myself, my relationship to time, to permission, to play, to productivity, and best of all, I got to know myself better and improved my self-trust.
What I learned:
There’s a mini-drill sergeant living in my head...
and it’s telling me all the things I should be doing with my time. AndI let that mini-dicator RULE my brain most of the time. This “no goals” day ended up being about giving the mini drill sergeant the day off, and passing the mic to another voice.When I asked my truer inner voice “What would YOU like to do?” she actually answered!
And guess what, my truest inner voice doesn’t actually want to sink into the couch for all eternity like I was afraid she would! She likes doing things!
Which brings me to…
Joy and delight: Turns out, when you get to follow your curiosity and genuinely choose to do something instead of doing it out of only obligation you enjoy it more! I sought out the most delightful way to do it instead of the most efficient.
It also gave me a few new items to add to my “treat menu” for those days I need some extra self-care, but don’t know what to do about it.
Productivity: (This was NOT the goal), but I either got MORE done OR felt like I did because I was more proud of the stuff I got done because there were no expectations to meet/not meet. So anything I did felt like I was going above and beyond instead of feeling like “I’m running out of time to do everything I need to get done!” Speaking of time…
Time Management: Apparently, on a typical day where I have some unscheduled time, I spend a lot of it deciding how to best use it. On my no-goals day, I spent no time in decision mode. By simply following my impulses, I spent less time in the gray area of decision-making and more time in the colorful parts of the day!
Scrolling: I scrolled WAY less. Turns out scrolling is my mini act of rebellion toward my mini-drill sergeant: “Yes! I WILL do the dishes! Just give me a second to sit here first, GOD!”
When I wasn’t putting something off or gearing up for something….I didn’t scroll. Other things sounded way better.
I let myself fully relax because I had permission (from myself) to do so. If the mini drill sergeant chimed in, I said…. “Nope, you’re not on the schedule today.”
Overall, I became more aware of: the things I like doing, my self-talk, my relationship to time, and my relationship with “permission.”
I learned that the mini-drill sergeant is probably hurting me more than helping. And I gained trust that the non-drill sergeant version of me is plenty responsible and capable on her own without someone yelling at her all day. I will not collapse into a useless puddle should I give the mini-drill sergeant some well-deserved time off.
I know every day can’t be a “no goals day,” but I would like to continue making it part of my schedule. If you’d like to go on that journey with me, let me know and we can hold each other accountable.
Sometimes all it takes is permission, so if you need that from someone….here you go. Here’s your permission.
If this sparked some peace and inspiration in you you can stop reading now! Thanks for reading and have a great day!
But…as promised, here’s the note for anyone whose feathers I’ve ruffled.
If you’re thinking: “Beth this is a very privileged experiment. Lots of people (especially parents/caregivers) cannot afford to let a day go by just following their whims and letting things slip through the cracks.”
I’ll respond by saying…”You’re right!” I’m lucky to have some flexibility of time at this point in my life.
AND… If this is your response you may not realize how in need you may be of a no-goals day, and there may be ways to adapt it to fit your extra busy life!:
Maybe it’s a half day.
Maybe you call it a “do the bare minimum day.”
Maybe you can include your family. Take them with you on your whim-y adventures. Or take turns choosing whose (reasonable) whims you might follow.
My aim is to challenge you to notice what voice is running your brain and get you in touch with a more centered and cared-for YOU! <3
Give it a try. I’d love to know how it goes for you.